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الرئيسية » الادب والشعر » امــــــرأة ايلـــــة للســـــقوط

امــــــرأة ايلـــــة للســـــقوط

يالهذا الوجع والاحتراق بين لهيب اللهفة وبركان الاشتياق ويا لهذا السباق بين البوح والصمت والافتراق.
مثل الفراشة انت تثيرين الحزن والدهشة والعجب وانت تدورين حول النار واللهب وتخترعين ’ لتداري خفق القلب وعذابات الاشتياق الف الف سبب.
تمرحين بغنج مرة وتبسمين ومرة بالصمت تغرقين واخرى تطرقين الى الارض كلما التقت نظراتكما محمرة الوجه محرجة خجلى وبنفس الوقت محترقة جذلى في كلامك تتلكئين وفي سيرك تتعثرين وفي كل خطوة يمينا ويسارا تتلفتين ولوقع خطواته مثل اجهزة الكشف عن الزلازل تتنصتين ’ تصمتين مرة ومرة تقهقهين ’ وتسعدين في سرك وتتلذذين كلما نجحت في تصويب سهام نظراتك الخارقة الماحقة الى من تقصدين بنفس الوقت الذي تتجاهلينه متصنعة عدم الاهتمام به وبابسط الاشياء عنه تتشاغلين تحاولين بشتى الاساليب الانثوية اخفاء لهيب حرائقك الداخلية ومع كل اساليب التمويه والتضليل والتهرب ومحاولة خداعه وخداع الاخرين خشية الكشف عن حقيقة احساسك وحبك وسرك الدفين الا أن تفاعلا في ثنايا النفس وفي اعماق القلب المتوجع يصوغ حروف الكلمة الواحدة الواعدة التي تلغي الزمان والمكان وتختصر صخب واعصار اروع مشاعر واحاسيس الانسان والتي فجرت باعماقك اعنف بركان وجعلتك مثل قشة وسط دوامات الطوفان ’وهي بحروفها الاربعة اشبه بالجهات الاربعة وأنت من حيث لا تدرين كنت بتصرفاتك واشتياقك ولوعتك ترسمين حروفها الرائعة بارتعاشة الروح الملهوفة المتوجعة وانت وجلة جزعة.
فالالف تداعبك فتستطيل مرة وتنحني طورا ’ وتتخابث وتعاند الاصابع ’ وتابى الخنوع والتراجع والحاء تهمس بسر الحياة ولابد ان تحتوينها وتحفرينها في اعماق الذات مهما حاولت لهفتك اخفاء بريقها بافتعال الازمات والغرق بين الدمع مرة ومرة بحرائق الاهات اما الباء فانها قارة من الاحتراق تتخفى وراء الخجل والحياء مرة واخرى بالانقطاع والضياع اما الكاف فانها تترجم لهفة وشوق ووجع وعذابات الانسان وما يختزنه من كنوز الاحاسيس ورهافة المشاعر وبحار الحنان في كل زمان ومكان ومع ذلك فانت تبوحي ولا تبوحي وتشتعلي وتداري اشتعالك وتتوجعي وتتواري وراء وجعك تكتبيها الف مرة وتمزقين ما كتبت ، ترسمينها بألوان المشاعر الملتهبة ’ ثم لا تلبثي ان تطمسينها باللون الاسود حتى لا يقرأها الاخرون وحتى لا يكتشفها الحساد والمنافقون.
وفي خضم حيرتك وضياعك ووجعك واحتراقك ولهفتك وفوضى افكارك وقلقك وتوزعك بين البوح والكتمان لا تدرين ان كل شهقة ونبضة وبسمة ودمعة وارتعاشة وتوجس وخوف وقلق بل ان كل شيئ فيك امسى يشي بألاعاصير والحرائق التي تأكل اعماقك وتملأ بالقلق جزيئات اوقاتك وتفاعلات افكارك.
فابتسامتك المصطنعة حب ونظراتك القلقة حب وخطواتك المتعثرة حب وادمانك على قراءة طالعك في فنجان القهوة حب وقلقك وتوجسك حب ودموعك حب والايحاء بالانشغال بقضايا تافهة حب وسؤالك عن الطقس حب واعترافك بانك تحبين السير تحت المطر حب والكلمات المتقاطعة التي تحاولين فـك رموزها حب وتسريحة شعرك حب وبحثك اليومي عن الابراج في الصحف والمجلات حب واللون البمبي الذي تفضلينه حب وروائح الفل والقداح والعنبر التي تسكرك حب وقهوتك الصباحية المرة حب وتجاهلك لمن تحبينه حب والتهرب من نظراته حب وافتعالك اللامبالاة لدى حضوره حب والتخفي وراء مفردات بعينها في مخاطبته حب .
حتى لكأنك منذ الف عام وعام وانت تحاولين في اليقظة وفي المنام وفي الحقيقة والاحلام ان ترسلي له كلمة واحدة لكنك في كل مرة تخفقين وفي اخر لحظة خجلة تتراجعين وتعودي حزينة تتألمين لتغرقي نفسك في بحار الدمع واللهفة والشوق الدفين وتبسمين امام الاخرين وانت تحترقين وتظهري المرح وانت تتوجعين وتتمنين الف مرة لو ان الهمزة فقط التي تتربع على الحرف الاول من تلك الكلمة تصله وتحرك مشاعره لهدأت براكين اللهفة باعماقك ولنمت قريرة العين بأجواء السعادة تحلمين.
سيدتي يامزيجا من ضوع الفل والعنبر والياسمين يا زهرة مبللة بندى العشق الدفين ’ لفرط ضياعك وقلقك واللهفة المشتعلة بأعماقك متمازجة بحرائق الحنين ولفرط اصطخاب مشاعرك العنيفة كالزلازل والبراكين ما كنت تدركين بأنه منذ النظرة الاولى احس كم كنت تحترقين وانت واقفة امامه شاردة مثل بناية ايلة للسقوط من عنف الزلزال تتأرجحين
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81 تعليق

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